Friday, December 21, 2007

Lump of coal

Well, the seesaw is just as nauseating as ever.

In the hopes that bad news spread is bad new diffused, and hoping that just telling you will somehow make me feel better enough to stop crying, let me just say:

They made a ridiculously low offer, and we made a high counter offer. We gave them until January 2 to respond, because we wanted to have the holidays in peace.

They rushed over today to tell us they bought the house next door, and have decided to build around us.

Merry Christmas, and fuck you, essentially.

And I drove home from the grocery store, $200 worth of holiday food and hospitality weighing down the trunk, as the tears fogged my eyes and the great wordless, noiseless sob rang in my ears and pulled at my face.

Pynchon says it's just a tactic, meant to terrify and cow us. Maybe. But how am I supposed to sleep at night? How am I supposed to get through these next ten days, days that, for months, I have been filling with happy hopes of family and snow and evenings by the fire and warm family suppers? When all I want to do is vomit? And I'm so scared I couldn't even bear to go to daycare tonight to pick up my daughter?


It's just me... said...

Oh Mimi. What a horrid time of the year to have this on your mind. I hope the holidays cheer them up - because should they truly fail to purchase your house I would hope their skills at neighborliness would be better than those of a potential home buyer.

I am sorry.

Listen to Pynchon - let the tears out - and then get your daughter to sing a holiday song for you. It won't make everything better but will probably make you laugh.

Omaha Mama said...

I'm so, so sorry for your fear and pain. It is unthinkable, what these people are doing to you. Lean on your Pynchon, let him be the brave one. And you, just do some baking. And hug your little girl. As long as you three are together, you will be okay.

Jenifer said...

I was hoping to hear some good news from you on this...I have no idea what to say. Maybe Pynchon is right, this is some kind of scare tactic. I know it seems bleak for some reason I just have a feeling that it is not over.

Wishing you all the best and sending you lots of good vibes so you can pull through the holidays with a smile or two.

Cloud said...

Oh Mimi! What sort of horrible people do this sort of thing at this time of year? I think Pynchon is probably right, though- didn't his research at the City turn up the fact that they'll need special permissions to build around you? I suspect they are bluffing. Can you ask sweetly to see their plans for building around you, so that you can decide if that seems bad enough to want to take their offer? I'll bet they can't come up with any.

I've got nothing for how you sleep at night, etc., so I'll just share the saying (which, according to my college Physics prof is a Portuguese proverb) that I always turn to when times are particularly trying: "Everything always works out well in the end. If things aren't going well, it is not the end yet."

bubandpie said...

Have they formally and legally rejected your offer? If not, I think it's safe to assume that rushing over to keep you updated is pure bluff.

cinnamon gurl said...

Oh, Mimi. This shit sucks. Huge.

But I think B&P makes a great point.

As for sleeping at night, I sometimes find it helps to really get into what's the worst thing that could happen. Usually, just putting words to it makes it smaller. If the worst thing is they build around you and your property value plummets (which I'm not convinced would happen), you can survive that. You will still have a home and you can still give Munchkin a full and happy life there.

Sending warm and peaceful and soporific holiday thoughts your way...

Mimi said...

They brought us back the offer, unsigned. So that's dead in the water, officially.

Maybe we could live with a building behind us; I'm not sure I could survive the excavation and building of underground parking, then two years of construction.

But maybe they're still playing mindgames with us. It's cruel and it's callous.

Lisa b said...

oh mimi this is terrible, I do suspect it is a tactic and I hope you are right in your previous post that the city will not allow it.
They are cruel and callous developers. Let me know if there is anything I can do. I love phoning my councilors. I am completely disgusted by the actions of these individuals.

Beck said...

I went through something unbearably terrifying last year close to this time and reading this reminds me of how it felt - and yet everything DID work out, in that way that life does.
It's a thin comfort, but I think a true one - next year at this time, this will be just a story and over.

Oh, The Joys said...

I'm so sorry, Mimi. I don't have the right words, but I'm thinking of you.


Karen said...

I'm sorry, truly and still hoping with whatever can hope and for whatever is left that can be hoped for - mostly that B&P is right and they are using this as another tactic and perhaps have a better offer for you - and also for peace for you and some sleep when you can get it.

alejna said...

The greed and callousness of those people makes my stomach turn. How can they sleep at night? And how much does it suck that you are the one losing sleep over this instead?

I'm inclined to think it's just a scare tactic, too. It really sounds like they want your land.

I wish I had some wisdom or comfort to offer. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, and during the holidays, too.

Mad Hatter said...

What bastards. What grinch-hearted bastards.

nomotherearth said...

I am starting to believe that some peoplr lack fundamental humanity. B&P makes a great point. The words of comfort I always turn to are "It's always darkest rightt before the dawn". Hang in there.

HumboldtsClio said...

Stay strong, and keep talking to your lawyer. Developers do this kind of thing for a living. The more miserable they make you, the better chance of getting property for cheap and thus more money.

Not sure about Canadian laws, but I think perhaps there are more options available to you than you might think. Not surprised they rejected your counter offer- probably this will go back and forth several times. It's not fun, but try not to let them get to you because then they win. It's like psychological warfare.

R said...

Chin up Mimi! The holiday is an emotional time in and of itself. They are using this knowledge to intimidate you. Which means they must really want your property. If they want it make them pay Your price and let them know that you will not budge. Until then, don't let the bastards get you down.

Have a great holiday!

slouching mom said...

Oh, God, Mimi. I'm so sorry. I hope they're only bluffing, the asshats.


Thinking about you.

Kyla said...

Oh Mimi. I am so very sorry. I hope it is asshatted bluffing, too.

This is the time that the one day at a time type living is necessary. You wake up, think only of things that are contained in THAT very day, and make it through. Don't think about the next ten days as a whole, it is too much.

Hang in there, and I hope good news will come your way soon.

Joyce said...

Mimi, I stumbled across your Blog some weeks ago and have been horrified to read about your dreadful situation. I know that all the kind words in world won't help and I'm afraid that in England our planning laws are very different from yours so I can't even offer any practical advice. But I would just like to say that however difficult things are at the moment, always remember that it isn't bricks and morter that make a home, it is the love and having read your musings it seems to me that you sound like a family that has that in spades!!

I hope that despite all ( or even to spite the bastards) you manage to have a Happy Christmas and I wish you the best of luck, with what ever you decide to do, for the new year.

Bee said...

Just dropped in to wish you a merry Christmas... nevertheless, and a better New Year,


the new girl said...

Oh, Mimi,
I'm just catching up. Gah. This is a nightmare. I'm so sorry.

I'm with Pynchon and it seems that these emm effers are playing the odds that they can man-handle you and intimidate you into capitulating.

Thinking of you.